Okay. I powered through the first half of the banned book, An Indigenous Peoples’ History of the United States in preparation for our Speakeasy. Now I have questions for my history teachers.
To be fair, I’m sure they taught me what was taught to them. It just wasn’t true. The persons we called “settlers” were nothing of the kind, because there was nothing on the continent than needed settling. The land had been well cultivated by the people living here. Until “settlers” drove them out. Our “settlers,” our military, and bands of mercenaries burned villages and crops, drove people from their homes, and massacred civilians, young and old. The practice of scalping that our films associate with Indigenous peoples came to this continent from its practice in the British Isles.
These war crimes were prompted and supported by our founders, including Presidents Andrew Jackson and George Washington. The novelist James Fenimore Cooper was complicit, using his art to perpetuate the lie of the savage. In truth, our nation was born out of genocide. And the slave trade.
Well, all this makes me miserable. I believed—was taught to believe—better of our founders. Better of the pilgrims, the “settlers,” the military. And I’m miserable, because my ancestors came from the British Isles. Who knows what some of them may have done? Still, I don’t want to be complicit through willful ignorance. So now what?
Jesus promised, “the truth will set you free.” Another wise human added, “but first it will make you miserable.”
Rethinking our beliefs is a miserable business. What do we stand on when the ground is shifting beneath our feet?
We stand on Truth, however miserable it makes us. And we stand in the power we have to live as we ought: recognizing our worth and the equal worth of others. In this season of self-reflection, we can do just that: choosing to do our own thinking. Choosing to live by values that help us reach our human potential and to be human toward others.
Acknowledging our ignorance, our biases, our mistakes, our faults takes courage. It’s miserable. And worth it. So, let’s keep seeking Truth. Let’s keep strengthening our souls by doing our own thinking. Let’s set ourselves free!
How do you stay open to truth? How do you deal with misery? What practices help you be who you want to be in the world? Share your thoughts at contact@aspaciousplace.com.
Tag Archives: Creativity
Soul & Solace: The Game of Life
As a child, I delighted in playing “The Game of Life.” Lifting the lid from the box, I extracted and opened the gameboard—complete with a built-in spinner! A banker was chosen (usually not me, because math is not my friend), then I chose my car. That’s right—I got to plop myself into the driver’s seat of my own primary-colored auto. To be exact, “I” was a pink peg. Then I set off on the road trip of my life! First: would I go to college and incur debt, or start right away on a lower-paying job. College it was: it would be worth it. I loved navigating the twists and turns and unexpected roadblocks along the way. In time, I secured a blue husband peg, then some pink and blue peg children. I motored along to retirement: the player who retired with the most money won. But, honestly—motoring around the gameboard, drawing cards, and imaging my life as a grown-up, that was my win!
A few years ago, our Young Artists Club studied Milton Bradley. I researched Bradley’s life—a decent chap, it seems, who, even in times of hardship, provided for the needs of children. Remembering my delight in Bradley’s “The Game of Life,” I purchased one for our club meeting, where our children would then design their own gameboards.
I lifted the box lid, opened the game board, and became the banker (sigh). Our club members chose their cars, and we were off! Except, as soon as I started handing out money, my gut clenched. I was doling out money like it was the ultimate value. As the children motored around the board, my discomfort increased. Success, the good life, was measured in procuring a heteronormative family (mom, dad, 2 to 3 kids), and dying with more money than your friends. Not the values A Spacious Place stands for; not the values I hope for these children. (And, reading Mr. Bradley’s bio, neither were they his. He continued to donate toys and books to children despite personal financial loss.)
After playing “The Game of Life,” our club talked. What do we love? What do we hope for our lives? What matters most to us?
So, I vote we create our own “Game of Life” gameboard. Let’s plan it with walking trails, so we can delight in nature, and with public transportation, so that everyone can get where they need to go. Let’s bank on lasting values—kindness, empathy, compassion, courage, justice—rather than on cash. Let’s make pegs in every color of the rainbow and let players choose what color feels like them. Let’s discover along the way many ways to be family. Let’s discover, as well, that we are enough simply as ourselves. Let’s have spaces where we gather in community and savor the moment we are in.
What if we make our lives, not about what I can acquire for myself, but what I have the potential to be, and what I have to give? What if we love our neighbors as ourselves?
We choose each day in this game of life what we live for, what we stand for. As we move into 2025, who and what do we want to be?
If you were to design a Game of Life gameboard, what would if look like? What are your hopes for your life? Share your thoughts at contact@aspaciousplace.com.
Soul & Solace: Hard Truths
Native American artists, exhibiting their work at the Blanton Museum, questioned me. Through photography, poetry, performance art, altar pieces, and collage, they asked: What is gender? Why national boundaries? How does language form belief? What are you not seeing?
The book, An Indigenous Peoples’ History of the United States, by Roxanne Dunbar-Ortiz challenged me to rethink the term “settler.” What did they settle, after all?
My history education, while it did not deny that Americans took the land of the native peoples; captured and enslaved persons from other lands; passed Jim Crow laws; and forced persons of Asian descent into internment camps, still managed to communicate that we were and are a good, decent nation. Really, the best of nations.
Rethinking those sanitized messages, realizing their impact on lives past and present, and the potential they carry for violence in the future hurt. I thought we were better. I thought we’d made more progress. I was wrong.
Ru Paul counsels us to look at the darkness, but don’t stare into it. How do we do that? Here are some ideas:
- Explore the visual, performance, and written art of persons on the margins;
- Do something that brings you joy;
- Receive news from more than one reputable source;
- Help someone who needs it;
- Use this link to discover whose native land your home/workplace/worship site is set on: https://native-land.ca/?emci=1c13d1ca-15a8-ef11-88d0-6045bdd62db6&emdi=777fea1a-47a9-ef11-88d0-6045bdd62db6&ceid=268119. Acknowledge that reality. Our home, and, thus the home of A Spacious Place, sits on land of the Comanche and Lipan Apache nations;
- Create something that speaks your truth!
We are, each of us, worthy of love and respect. Knowing that for ourselves, recognizing that for our neighbors—far and near—enables us to see the darkness, but live in the light.
What are your thoughts on our nation’s choices? How do you care for yourself and for others? Share your thoughts at contact@aspaciousplace.com.
Soul & Solace: Books to Count On
We’ve entered holiday counting season: Advent counts down the days until Christmas, then the 12 Days of Christmas count down to Epiphany; Channukah counts eight days of miraculous light; Kwanzaa counts seven values of African American culture.
So we’re doing a Spacious take on a counting calendar: beginning with the first day of Advent (Dec. 1), we’ll highlight daily a picture book we love. We have a huge selection of Advent books, a few Channukah books, and we are seeking suggestions both for additional Channukah reads (which begins at sundown, Dec.25) and Kwanzaa (which begins on Dec. 26) reads for children. Email your suggestions to kaye@aspaciousplace.com.
We’ll focus on picture books, since they are an accessible delight for all ages. You’ll find our “Children’s Book Counting Calendar” selections on our Instagram, Threads, and Facebook sites.
Share your favorite holiday reads and tell us your thoughts on our suggestions! Let’s make this a reading holiday! Share your thoughts at contact@aspaciousplace.com.
Soul & Solace: Bi—Nary
Snips and snails and puppy dog tails, that’s what little boys are made of.
Sugar and spice and everything nice, that’s what little girls are made of.
Blue for boys. Pink for girls.
Trousers for boys. Skirts for girls.
Short hair—boys. Long hair—girls.
He/him. She/her.
Our maxims, our dress codes, our societal norms, even our language classifies gender as either/or: B or G, M or F. Until recent years, I didn’t know otherwise.
I learned that every person’s body contains both male and female hormones: testosterone and estrogen. It’s just a matter of degree. At our birth, a doctor, observing our physicality, assigned us a sex. And then, based on that determination, our culture took over and taught us how to behave: in other words, constructed our gender.
Gender training starts early and lasts a lifetime. At A Spacious Place, we teach persons of all ages; and in every class someone says, “Blue is a boy’s color; pink is girly.” My response is, “Why would you let someone else tell you what you can like?”
October’s banned book read is the nonfiction, Beyond Magenta, by Susan Kuklin: a writer and photographer. Ms. Kuklin interviewed and photographed six transgender youth. Being nonbinary, not fitting neatly into slot M or F, is a hard life in our culture. Reading their stories, standing briefly in their shoes, leaves the reader in grief, in hope, in awe.
Despite the violence visited on these young people because of who they are, these youth hoped their stories would help others who are isolated and confused. Their sagas also aid those who identify comfortably as M or F, to broaden our worldview and to celebrate diversity. The glossary and list of resources in the back of the book serve as navigation tools for unfamiliar terms and ideas.
When we recognize the fullness of the gender spectrum, we all access a fuller range of possibilities and powers. In the words of Ted Lasso we can: “Be curious, not judgmental.”
I grew up as a girl. Even so, I always thought “snips and snails and puppy dog tails” sounded a lot more actionable and exciting than did a nice confection. It seems I won’t let someone else tell me what to like either—how about you?
What are your thoughts on gender? On socialization? On self-acceptance? Diversity? Share your thoughts at contact@aspaciousplace.com.
Soul & Solace: Cruel Summer
Have you heard Bananarama’s song, “Cruel Summer?” The plaintive melody accompanies lyrics that describe a sweltering season make crueler by circumstance. 2024 was, for us, a cruel summer: due to a perfect storm of hardship and heartache. Hardships global and national; heartbreak in vocation and for our family. Then, days before our creativity camp’s start date—with materials and food purchased and prepped, our house transformed into a space station, parents counting on us for childcare and children jazzed about launching their imaginations into space, we got grounded.
Mere weeks before the CDC approved a new vaccine for recent strains of the virus, COVID swept through our family. We had to cancel camp. We’ve never done that before: even during the worst of the pandemic, we went online, delivering art supplies to participants’ doors and guiding learning via the Internet.
In its eighteen years of service, A Spacious Place has made its way through a more than our share of hardships and heartbreaks. We’ve always picked ourselves up, dusted ourselves off, and got back to it. This time was different. This time I saw no way forward. Felt no hope.
When the virus was done with me, the communities we serve awaited. I waded through preparation and packing for the simple reason that I couldn’t stand to be around myself if I let these people down. It helped that my family was there for me.
Classes got easier each time we went, each time we watched creativity unfold and faces find grins. Each day had its bright spots. For our August Young Artists Club, we provided Messy Art Day activities we’d planned for camp. The afternoon was messy, noisy, laugh-filled, wet, and wonderful.
I suspect someone reading this piece knows about cruel seasons. My hope for you is
1. That you be especially kind to yourself; wounds require rest and care;
2. That you take a step forward in hope, even if it’s a baby step; and
3. That you stay connected with someone who loves you unconditionally. We need connection, especially when times are cruel.
Today, I’m grateful for cooler temperatures and the promise of fall leaves. For the people we serve and for those who serve alongside us. And hope. I’m grateful always for hope.
What helps you hope? What do you do for self-care? Do you have a song that names a life experience for you? Share your thoughts at contact@aspaciousplace.com.
Soul & Solace: FReadom
I am a straight, white woman in a long-term monogamous heterosexual relationship (to be precise, I’m actually the hue of an underdone biscuit, except in the summer, when I’m lightly toasted). It would be hubris for me to assume I could “get” the lived experience of persons who face challenges I do not share. And it would be inhumane of me to choose personal comfort over living as a neighbor in our global community. It would be an act of violence for me to go the polls and simply vote for myself, instead of voting for my community.
We vote singly, but we always vote with repercussions that reach far beyond our small orbit. Thus, one purpose for our Banned Book Speakeasy: we read books which tell the stories that expand our understanding of and deepen our empathy for persons whose life experience differ from our own.
Our current banned book read is The Hate U Give by Angie Thomas. As a child, I was told to find a police officer if I needed help. The protagonist in The Hate U Give received very different instructions about the police from her parents, because she is a Black girl. I was married in a church as a member of the ministerial staff with a large congregation giving full support. One character in The Perks of Being a Wallflower was beaten for loving another boy; and that boy could not find his way out of the closet. I grew up in a world that allowed me to experience sexual intimacy when I chose. Maya Angelou was raped at age eight: an experience she recounts with pain and poetry in I Know Why the Caged Bird Sings.
This Soul & Solace is a plea for us to stand up for the freedom of each person to speak/draw/sing/write/read their truth, and against the efforts of those, who already have far more than most, to rob others of their voice, their vote, and their right to life, liberty, and the pursuit of happiness. We may not share the life experiences of everyone in our community, but we make every effort to stand in their shoes by reading and listening to their words; by praying for their freedom; by casting a vote, not for ourselves alone, but for our community. Our next Banned Book Speakeasy is September 1, from 2 until 3:30 p.m. We hope you’ll join us!
What books have expanded your understanding of others? How do you feel about book burning? About selecting how to vote? Share your thoughts at contact@aspaciousplace.com.
Soul & Solace: Confessions
Some Austinites delight in outdoor summer exercise. Well-earned sweat glistens on their tanned and toned bodies and anoints their beatific smiles. I confess, my summer walks feel like toiling up Mount Doom to cast the ring of power into the sweltering flames that forged it.
Some people welcome chores as a time to pray for those the task benefits: for the partner/spouse whose laundry they’re doing, for the child whose room they’re dusting. I confess that even the thought of chores makes me cranky. And my chief and fervent chore prayer is that it will be DONE.
There are those whose faith life is joyful, comforting, unquestioning. I confess that mine is more adolescent and angsty. I stomp around, troubled by torments both personal and global, wondering why God doesn’t DO SOMETHING and what is taking SO LONG?
Why am I sharing these personal vignettes? Mainly because, if someone is going through an adolescent faith phase, I hope they’ll feel a bit less alone and bit more encouraged. Also, because whether or not a reader relates to my angst just now, they may do someday, or someone they love may as well. And last, because, should a practice feel like drudgery or delight, it’s motives and actions that form our faith.
So. Whether we relish chores or not, we do them to provide a clean, welcoming space for those who dwell in or visit our home. We exercise, whether it’s a delight of a discipline, to give our body its best chance for a healthy, abundant life. We keep praying, reading Scripture, worshiping, and living the tenets of our faith because, no matter how confused and frustrated we are, God is the deepest love and allegiance of our lives.
We don’t have to pretend. Our lives, our faith can be as real and as individual as we are.
As we move into May and spring cleaning, and look toward summer and sweltering temps, we can do so with a faith that allows us to question, to anguish, and to grow.
How do you feel about Texas heat and outdoor exercise? About chores? About a lived faith? Share your thoughts at contact@aspaciousplace.com.
Soul & Solace: Let’s Talk About Sex
My high-school health teacher assigned me a research project on abortion. Surprising, right, for a seventies military school in the deep south? Still, that was the assignment, and as research material, she suggested what was commonly known as the “little yellow book” and whose actual title was “Everything You Always Wanted to Know About Sex: But Were Afraid to Ask.” I relayed the information to my mother and was met with pursed lips and a gaze of steel. Nevertheless, she purchased the book and placed it into my hands with a command as from on high: “Only read the chapter on abortion. Do NOT read any more of that…thing.”
I, of course, read the book cover to cover: a fact my mother knew and expressed disgust about. Since that time, I’ve made healthy, informed decisions about sex due, in part, to the little yellow book, and also, in part, to my upbringing.
So why am I sharing this pearl from my days of youth? Two reasons, really: both tied to choice. First relates to parenting. Parents ought not be the sole selectors of their children’s reads. Why? Because 1) caring parents are hard-wired to protect their offspring (to my mother’s mind, knowing about sex would lead to acting on that knowledge and down the slippery slope I would go), and, while protection is necessary, so is challenge. Youth need to read books that stretch their perspectives, that trouble their preconceptions, that fire their imaginations, and that show them their potential: for good or ill. Also, 2) parents are people, and, as such, have limits. That’s why we need pediatricians, school teachers, and librarians. At some point, we parents need to trust these professionals to care about, and to care for, our children.
The second reason is tied to recent legislation restricting choice, including Texas’ book-banning legislation (largely focused on books about race and gender), which purports to support parents’ rights.
Perhaps the rights of some hand-picked parents. Certainly, not all parents. But even so, the point is not parents’ rights: it is children’s rights. The right to learn what will feed their souls. The right to find in the library a wealth and diversity of readings to blow their minds with possibility. Because, in the end, children of caring parents will, in turn, care what their parents believe. A book on the banned list could well be a key that opens a deep family conversation about values and choices. Let’s not be so fearful of another’s perspective that we shut down the possibility of such teachable moments. Does banning The Cider House Rules lead a woman to make compassionate, informed choices? Or a man to respect the consequences of his desire for the woman—or young girl—involved? Whatever our position on abortion, or any other ethical conundrum, does denying knowledge of differing perspectives result in healthy, informed choice for anyone?
Choices that restrict the choices of others carry serious consequences: not made any less serious because the choice-restrictors refuse to see them.
I offer this pearl from my teen years as a plea: let us, as creative people, take a stand for books, for knowledge, for imagination, for selfhood—and for choice itself. We stand at a crossroads in this nation. Let‘s together choose the path that leads to choice for all.
What are your thoughts on choice, on reading, on parenting? We would love to hear from you. Share your Soul & Solace thoughts at contact@aspaciousplace.com.
Want more info on book bans? Check out https://ilovelibraries.org/ and mark your calendars for this year’s Banned Books Week: September 18-25, 2022 (https://bannedbooksweek.org/).
To support “a world in which all children can see themselves in the pages of a book,” check out We Need Diverse Books: https://diversebooks.org/.
Concerned about other restrictions on our choices and rights? The ACLU and Southern Poverty Law Center work to defend the liberties of all U.S. Americans and to combat injustice and hatred. You can learn more about them at https://www.aclu.org/ and https://www.splcenter.org/ , respectively.
Making Yourself Discoverable as a Creative
Making Yourself Discoverable as a Creative
Your success as a creative—an artist, designer, craft maker, tarot reader, or similar—depends more on your ability to find an audience than it does on how good you are. Essentially, unless you practice a unique art or craft, there are countless other equally talented people doing what you do. Your ideal audience or customer base is likely spoiled for choice. To stand out, you’ll need to make yourself discoverable—which requires serious marketing chops.
A Spacious Place offers a creating connectivity course to take your creative business to new heights. Learn critical skills that help you shine, from interpersonal relationship management to out-of-the-box thinking to create better. In this mini-guide, we offer expert suggestions on how you can make yourself findable as a creative:
Get serious by—constantly—putting yourself out there
First and foremost, persistently put yourself out there. Share your creations, don’t be shy, and just focus on tooting your own horn a little, even if you aren’t feeling as confident as you could be. If you create music or art, you could share song snippets or pictures that you’re proud of. If you sell a service, share a video of a session in action. Set up profiles on leading social media channels. Have a website, blog, or podcast. Focus on communicating who you are. Keep doing it long-term, until you build up a solid repository that will act as a portfolio cum audience magnet for years to come.
Create a brand identity
A brand identity is more than a logo or product, says bynder—it’s the general impression you leave on your consumers and what differentiates you from the competition. All the most successful creatives on the planet, from singers like Taylor Swift to artists like Takashi Murakami, focus on their branding. It’s what makes them memorable and enables them to form an emotional bond with their followers. As a creative, figure out what’s at the heart of your offering. Then turn it into your identity and let it accompany you everywhere.
Have a website or a blog
Your website or blog can be an enormously useful asset. Not only does it allow people to get to know you, but it can help you establish yourself as an authority in your niche. Depending on your line of work, you could even sell your creations directly on your site. Lastly, your site could automatically attract customers from search engines. Make sure your website looks beautiful, and follow SEO best practices to increase your search rankings.
Use high-quality images or videos
Human brains are wired to be responsive to images, reports Canva. A high-quality picture or video gives customers an in-depth look at what you do, heightens the user experience, and makes you seem more professional and reliable. Your online promotional content should always be accompanied by a high-quality snap.
Cross-promote
Cross-promotion is having another creative promote you in exchange for you promoting them. This can be a highly beneficial strategy. You get access to a ready-made user base. Furthermore, the association with a respected creative can be good for your reputation. For the best results, make sure you pick a creative in a complementary but non-competing niche.
Be practical and set up your own business
If you’re serious about making money from your creative skills, you would do well to set up a lifestyle business or similar. It’s only when you treat what you do like a business will you make money from it. Start by making a business plan, which is a document covering all the practicalities of doing business and being profitable. It will allow you to figure out essential specifics on becoming commercially viable, from market research and product development to sales and customer engagement.
Use an invoicing software to stay in control of your finances
Invoicing software is an essential accompaniment for your business. It will allow you to keep accurate books, figure out your profit margin, and make it simpler for customers to pay you. Always choose software for invoicing with online payment support, notifications for customer invoice views and payments, and the ability to schedule invoicing for recurring payments.
Conclusion
Don’t forget to believe in yourself. Inject enthusiasm and confidence in everything you do. Self-belief can be a very attractive quality to have and will shine through your creations. If you value your offerings and take pride in your work, your creations are bound to fly off the shelves.